Author: Jason Zerbey

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365 Devotionals: How I Became A Homeschool Dad

“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!”
-Matthew 25:21

When I became a (temporary) stay-at-home dad, God made it clear that I was aligning myself with my purpose in that time. I was far from becoming a Christian, but He was clear in steering me into intentional parenting.

I invested time, reflection, and effort into the most meaningful work I had ever done. God rewarded me with the inspiration, drive, and inhuman energy to become a home educator. My wife and I transformed our expectations, rhythms, and assumptions to fit these new responsibilities.

Fine tuning my investment energy is constant work, as new opportunities to care for my self, my sons, my loved ones, and my community arise and draw me near.

There was a lot of self care this week. Four nights of soccer and a return to yoga have my clothes washer full of sweat equity.

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365 Devotionals: Our Beautiful Anarchy

“It should not be that way among you. Whoever wants to become great among you must serve the rest of you like a servant.”
-Matthew 20:26

I’ve been asked many times to take more credit for our Allschoolers group than I want to. The power of the group is in its members. We’re a varied group of parents who were looking for connection in an era of social distance. We knew in our guts that we are not supposed to live at distance from one another, but in loving embrace of our fellow humans.

There’s very little for me to do as a leader. I help set dates and locations and bring wood for our winter fires. I get far more out of our weekly meetups than I put in. The moms and dads I’ve met in the group are my best friends. We check in with each other and it’s rare that our Wednesday meetups are the only time we see each other in a week.

I’m empowered by my service to Allschoolers. They are support, inspiration, and encouragement on the difficult journey of home education. Someone told me today that they’d be lost these last two years without the group. I can only return the sentiment and echo the gratitude.

It is not an expressly Christian group, but everyone is free and encouraged to proclaim their passions. We share religious and secular resources and it is the most inclusive social group I’ve been blessed to take part in. Soccer is close as far as diversity of backgrounds goes, but the common goal there is much simpler than the complicated considerations and opinions of home educators. We’re individuals raising individuals. The layers of specificity demand compassionate listening and vulnerable communication.

I can’t say why it works so well. There aren’t a bunch of rules and there is almost no structure (I suppose that makes sense as the founders are unschoolers). It is our beautiful anarchy.

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An Unfortunate Throwback

Two years ago I wrote a warning about the predictable effects of Lockdown. It didn’t seem like anyone was listening, but soon after I began to find my Lockdown tribe. We got our children together and shared woth each other the ways we were staying sane. Many of these women were homeschool moms, and more moms and dads joined the ranks as pressures exposed the failures of the system.

Digging For Courage: An Air of Toxic Masculinity

Out tribe is strong and the fight for sanity carries on. More families are deciding to home educate their children each day. The world is getting more sane as people free themselves from the systems government uses to keep us in line.

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365 Devotionals: What are you Creating?

“The Kingdom of Heaven is like a mustard seed planted in a field. It is the smallest of all seeds, but it becomes the largest of garden plants; it grows into a tree, and birds come and make nests in its branches.”
-Matthew 13:31-32

Nothing is static. We are moving toward Heaven or we are moving toward Hell. We create in the direction we move. We can’t have Heaven on Earth, but we can move to create a more heavenly earth.

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365 Devotionals: Persistence

“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.”
-Matthew 7:7-8

Align your thinking with God when you pray. You will seek the good and the beautiful the world needs.

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Manliness and Meaning

The first rule of manliness is that we don’t talk about manliness.

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I read Chuck Palahniuk’s Fight Club about 23 years ago, right before the movie was announced for release. I was at my most nihilistic and certain the movie would be a terrible bastardization. After watching with my sons for the first time, it holds up as one of the best book-to-screen adaptations I have seen before the advent of long-form streaming shows. Although wildly different, the endings of each are disappointing.

The questions asked by the story are intractable. They have been forefront in my mind since I became a single male in sole charge of two boys.

The men in Fight Club are desperate for meaning. They would sacrifice their lives for a taste of it. Yet, none of them can achieve that meaning on their own. The central character, the avatar of (perhaps “toxic”) manliness, Tyler Durden, is a schizophrenic split within his figuratively castrated host. In fact, castration features heavily in the film with regular returns to the theme of separating males from their genitalia.

We are disconnected from our bodies, our sexuality, our strength, and our search for meaning. I have met women who cannot name one impressive man in their history. Impotent in every sense of the word, there is a famine of positive masculinity in the world.

Nihilism and schizophrenia are not the answer. Individual responsibility and work are a start, but we need more than these to inspire men to greatness. I don’t know what. I think and try everyday to model compassion and strength to my sons. It can seem like a futile effort when faced with the madness of the world.

I’m trying to be vulnerable and explore these questions out loud, to seek the answers in my sons and others. I lean heavily on scripture to teach me the lessons that society has deemed unimportant.

It’s a process I hope to share and grow through these posts. I will keep asking questions and hope to be humble enough to receive the answers.

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365 Devotionals: Ego

“When you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”
-Matthew 6:3-4

Ego is always knocking. It takes effort to promote service opportunities, but not self inflate for being involved.

Lord, help me to serve you more humbly, more quietly, and more completely.

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