Category: 30-Day Gratitude Challenge

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Grateful for Rebel Friends

On the first day of increased Lockdown restrictions I was able to host home educating and distance learning families for a few hours of Lego building and fellowship. We didn’t treat each other as if we were diseased threats, nor did we observe government mandated gathering limits.

These friends are all new. The variety of perspectives and backgrounds in our small group is astounding. I could talk with any of these moms for hours and I love listening to their journeys.

None of them knew Mary. I love hosting people in the home we built together. She would have it no other way. Well, she wouldn’t be okay with the level of clutter that I am.

I’m grateful for the people in my life who will not bow down to nonsensical restrictions on our rights of assembly, movement, and speech.

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The Rights to Speak Against Government and Peacefully Assemble

Protests are messy. There are always elements we don’t agree with. We don’t chant and we don’t hold signs. We differ on a lot of issues from the speakers and attendees, but I choose to stand with those who are fighting against a Lockdown that is destroying lives all over the world.

The Lockdown is keeping social, educational, physical health, and spiritual resources away from children and vulnerable individuals. It puts us all in harm’s way. It weakens our souls, bodies, homes, budgets, and immune systems. It has broken peer support groups and strained relationships.

The Lockdown is an experiment without metrics. It is arbitrary and full of the usual corruption. Those who impose it do not know you and do not know what is best for you. Only you can make the best choices for yourself and your family.

Trust yourself and fight for your freedom, every darn inch of it.

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Thankful for Forgiveness

I missed my gratitude blog post yesterday. I haven’t trained jiu-jitsu in weeks due to a skin infection. I yelled at my children. I didn’t know how communicate with my girlfriend. I’ve made people uncomfortable. I missed some cold therapy showers. I haven’t been all that I could be.

I can forgive myself for these things. I can accept Jesus’s forgiveness of my innumerable sins. I am thankful for today and all the opportunities I have to make the world better.

I’m thankful my son’s jiu-jitsu tournament is happening as scheduled. I’m thankful to see friends this afternoon. I’m thankful for live theater tonight. I’m thankful for a beautiful, caring, and patient girlfriend and a chance to work on my communication skills.

It’s a beautiful day.

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A Grateful Troublemaker

Jordan Peterson talks about how at one point in Soviet Russia, 1 in 3 people was informing to the government police. That meant that there was likely someone in your home who might report on your activities or “wrong” thoughts or words.

We’re getting a sample of what that society looks like right now. My business owner friends are terrified of misstepping on a Lockdown restriction and being reported. These informants rarely give the owner a chance to reconcile.

I haven’t seen one person who wears a proper mask properly. So what does one do when they know they’re not in strict compliance? Point a finger at someone else. These screamers in supermarkets know they can’t follow the rules, so they look to put the spotlight on someone they perceive to be an easier target.

Without principles and an understanding of history and psychology, we are heading down a dark, familiar road. The French who started their Revolution ended up dead at the hands of their proteges. The Russians who supported their Revolution ended up in gulags. Alexander Solzhenitsyn was a party loyalist until he was locked away and became the Soviet’s greatest enemy.

Am I making a slippery slope argument? I don’t know, our society is different from those and I’m a ridiculous optimist. But we’re human and fallen and vulnerable to all the same fears that the Jacobins and Societ Communists were.

Either way, I don’t need a slippery slope. I don’t like the society I see right now. I think it is worth fighting against these radical changes that continue to destroy lives every day.

I’m going to be the guy that won’t rat. I’d rather be locked up on Thanksgiving or Christmas than be the one to lock someone else up. That’s the choice. If you think you can lay low and let this blow over, if you think you can give up a couple family get togethers and get back to “normal,” if you think you can be compliant enough to not take a side, I promise you’re taking the wrong side and you will end up crushed under the thumb of the regulatory state.

I’m grateful for history, psychology, and my God given love of the individual. I’m grateful for the fight that He has put in my heart. I’m grateful that I was made this way.

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A Grateful Heart

I’m grateful for the rebel heart that God has put in my chest. My love for life blazes fiercely.
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When I see a meme that claims there are alternatives to living this short life to its fullest, I wonder what that looks like?
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A car ride can kill me. A soccer game can lead to a broken skull. A camping trip can lead to weeks of poison sumac infection. Love will hurt. The list of life’s dangers is infinite.
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I choose to live with infinite blessings, looking for the love in each moment.

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Thankful for Music

I could write 30 days of posts about how important music is in my life, but the Lockdown has drastically changed the way I listen to it.

Live music has been virtually nonexistent and there have been no big shows or festivals. In an effort to fill in the enormous void of cultural events and resources that make up our learning lifestyle, we have listened to many more audiobooks and podcasts. Akira the Don’s meaningwave has been there for when my boys are a little tired of speeches and stories, but that’s not like my old, playlist-obsessed ways.

I’ve also had technical problems with my music collection. Some of which I started to iron out today. I went first to the staples that have connected my sons to their late mother. David Bowie, Michael Franti, Parliament Funkadelic, and Iggy Pop carry strong memories of my married life. They are guaranteed triggers for my grief. The wave of joy and sadness that I cherish. Sadness for the loss and joy that, for all my growth and self-discovery, Mary still holds a special place in my heart. Somehow, she shares in my joy at hearing those songs and telling those stories. It’s not only a connection to our sons, but to all in my life who love and share music with.

I thought music meant the world to me before I was widowed. I thought I lived life to its fullest. In these nearly three years, I have learned that there is no limit to the joys that can be reached in this life.

Every day I am ready for new and amazing experiences, even if they are as simple as rediscovering forgotten B-sides.

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Grateful for My Journal

As I struggle with decisions and finding clarity, I am reminded of the journaling that I have neglected in recent months.

I’m too tired for anything but sleep tonight, but I know this will be here in the morning to receive my pen and help me through my muddled thoughts.

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Thankful for This View

I start most days outside, on my mat, looking up at this sky. Often it’s dark, but we had a late night by the fire and I enjoyed the warmth of the sun this morning.

I spend 15-20 minutes on Wim Hof Breathing, meditation, prayer, body scanning, and generally calming the busy thoughts that rise before the sun.

Today was a tough one. Uncertainty has a grip on me. I humbly ask God for guidance as I navigate relationships and question my church community. Big questions.

I hope to spend more time communing with the Lord today. It’s going to be a beautiful day and I have always connected with Him most when outside.

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Thanking God

Whether I wake up in a good place or a bad place, I always try to spend some time thanking God for the innumerable blessings in my life.

It reminds me not to take credit for my fortunes, nor my misfortunes. It reminds me that I can guide my thoughts and focus on those blessings while I work to multiply them.

I thank God this morning for the sunrise and a new day of opportunity, connecting with friends, and adventuring.