In Defense of Lego

Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. 

In my search for positive parenting resources I couldn’t resist listening to this minimalist approach to managing Lego from Dr. Denaye Barahona. To be sure, we are not minimalists when it comes to Lego. Our biggest projects bring us together and can demand a lot of bricks. However, I felt Dr. Barahona went too far in reducing modern Lego to being a “closed” toy too focused on licensed characters and predetermined builds.

You can hear her podcast episode here:

Our 2017 entry for the Kalmar Nyckel Lego Shipbuilding Contest

Only a few years ago I held a similar nostalgia for when Lego had a much smaller variety of elements and imagination was the key ingredient. I looked at a Lego banana and said, “What else could this be but a banana? How can this foster creativity?” It didn’t take long for me to see that banana put to use as a horn, smile, weapon (as all elements eventually find themselves in the hands of boys), mustache, lever, nose, tongue, or any number of curved objects. 

The Friendliest Minotaur

My sons started playing with Lego at our local libraries. Big, unsorted piles and no instructions. They applied their imaginations with ease and learned to break down their builds after a couple hours. These habits served them well as loving family began to shower us with official sets during birthdays, Christmas, and all types of occasions.

I was wary of the licensed sets with built-in stories and characters. Again, it didn’t take long for my sons to twist, expand, and mash-up the characters and stories. My elder son became masterful at using our wide variety of minifigure parts to create his own heroes and villains or copy them from books and movies. He also recreates his favorite scenes while his younger brother builds endless assortments of wacky beasts and insane vehicles.

Sets rarely stay together for long. Sometimes following the instructions is just to check off a line item and the model is immediately disassembled to access new elements.

The 2018 SS Mary Zerbey Memorial Seasteader, built in honor of the wife and mother we lost weeks earlier.
My son’s free build copy of the Haida Spirit Boat in the Copeland Maritime Center’s Watercraft of the World gallery.

Sorting starts at the model level. The larger the set, the more need there is to categorize the elements and place them roughly into piles. Sorting of larger collections does take parental guidance, but it is worth it when they can access the full breadth of the inventory to fuel their imaginations.

Our Unikitties
A collaborative train project by almost a dozen homeschoolers.

Dr. Barahona claims Lego has become a “closed” toy, to be built and displayed. I assert that this only occurs without a little creative encouragement.

However, I would concede that this is not a pursuit for the minimalist.

The question at 6:00 am: What to build?

God bless,
Jason

p.s. – For his “Mind Body Soul Time” today my elder once again chose Lego building.

Day Three of My Positive Parenting Challenge: Mind Body Spirit Time

hippie dancing GIF

“Dad, that sounds way too hippy for us.”

That was the response after my sons thoroughly enjoyed the one-on-one time I dedicated to each of them during the day, as suggested by Amy McCready. One chose 15 minutes of tinkering with old electronics in the morning and the other chose Lego building.

In the evening, my elder requested I read aloud some of his latest book club book, In the Footsteps of Crazy Horse, and my younger had me help him with a “poop” heavy ad lib story.

I could see that not only did each appreciate the focused interaction, but also respected when it was the other’s turn.

We’re working on alternative names for our particular sessions as “Mind Body Spirit Time” is “too hippy” for them. So far, I’ve had to veto “Poopy Time,” but I think we’re heading in the right direction.

God bless,
Jason

Day Two of My Positive Parenting Challenge

get well hug GIF

As resources pour in from so many wonderful people, my sons and I came up with our own rule: Instant Hugs. As soon as tension rises, a voice raises, or someone feels he’s been mistreated, BOOM, hug. No cure-all, but has definitely cut down on several escalations already.

I’ve been blessed by friends, family, and acquaintances with reading and listening suggestions. I’m starting with Amy McCready’s If I Have to Tell You One More Time…, Charlotte Kasl’s If the Buddha Had Kids, Eckhart Tolle’s Enlightened Relationships, Mr. Dad’s Positive Parenting Radio podcast, and Denaye Barahona’s Simple Families podcast.

And I found all of those before a Facebook call for help built my “Next, please,” list!

I’m looking forward to this journey with my sons and excited to share it.

God bless,
Jason

My First 30-Day/10-Day Challenges

gary oldman leon GIF

I yelled at my son again. He was upset because his brother and a friend were being unkind. The problem was that we had to leave and his crying was not convenient. Yeah, sounds pretty stupid. I could make all the excuses of the warnings and countdowns and the day’s earlier indiscretions…but my son’s feelings were hurt and I didn’t console him.

Every day for the next 30 days I’m going to consume positive parenting information, try to implement it, and write about my failures and successes. I won’t list my initial resources yet as I need to get started NOW.

I’m also on Day 2 of a 10-Day Challenge to host Thanksgiving, so might share some of that too!

God bless,
Jason

A Creative Space

When I suddenly lost my wife and the mother of my young sons, Mary, in February of this year, I felt an emptiness, a hole inside my personality. The edges were ragged and distorted. Sinews of what was left of me were pulled in and broken off in the black space. I was bleeding out into it, chasing the loss and disappearing.

God’s love poured into it. A healing light filled the space and touched every abrasion, laceration, and amputation. There would be much more work to come, but God saved me from that paralyzing pain.

Genesis 1:1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

“Create”: verb: to evolve from one’s own thought or imagination, as a work of art or an invention.

Losing a spouse is an end and a beginning. I don’t know what I could create at the end of a story. I don’t know what work can be accomplished on a finished product. But I can imagine endless possibilities at the beginning. My imagination went to work in that hole in the minutes after Mary died. It was cautious and modest at first. I’d tend to the wounds that God had put on the path to healing and I would start to grow something in that empty space. Like an iguana, I limited myself to the size of the cavity. I didn’t see it at first, but all my imaginings fit in a perceived pit. This hollow space was part of my imagination. Maybe it had been there for a moment, but God hadn’t simply passed through and patched it up, he filled it with an immutable light that would never go out.

I was working in the wrong place.

I had the revelation that I was already whole. I wasn’t less, I was more. More equipped to handle hardship, more conscious of pain in myself and others, more understanding of individuals who I had previously thought different from me. It wasn’t a complete revelation. Nine months later and, at times, I find myself trying to fill a hole that isn’t there. In one moment, I’m learning, growing, and reaching out into the world with curious wonder. In the next, I’m longing.

I’m going to make myself stronger today, more whole. I’m going to wake up each day and renew that pledge.

God bless,
Jason

WXPN Free at Noon

April 1, 2011: World Cafe Live at the Queen opens with a Free at Noon show from Sonny Landreth. Our second son was born a month later and had to wait a few months before he got to see Dengue Fever and Matthew Sweet in Wilmington.

Every Friday World Cafe Live hosts a free lunchtime concert. The next week’s act is announced immediately after each show and all you have to do to get on the list is register here.

These are full-on shows. They’re broadcast live and the artists are often on the rise, so the performances have that high-profile feel. Down on the big WCL stage it’s a lot more like Saturday night than midday Friday. The shows are shorter, they don’t run past 1:00 pm, but performers will often play a couple more songs after the broadcast has ended.

Matthew Sweet in 2011
VIP Balcony Seating

When WXPN was still in Wilmington, Mary would take a long lunch and join us. I think we took advantage of every Free at Noon down at 500 N. Market. A particular highlight was the Queen’s Fifth Anniversary Celebration with Ben Harper. Although I saw him at Woodstock ’99, Mary had a great collection of his music and I got to appreciate the variety and depth of his talent.

Ben Harper 2016: Photo credit unknown: c/o WXPN

Mary never joined us at a Philly show, but family often joined us at shows from JD McPherson, Lissie, Valerie June, The Ting Tings, and Calexico.

Getting that jambalaya at Reading Terminal Market after Lissie, 2016 
Warming up for Valerie June in 2017
Valerie June

#Protips for Families:

Ear Protection! In-ear or over-ear, these are shows are full volume. Also, folks will hassle you about taking care of your children’s ears. It gets on my nerves, but I try to take it as helpful.

Secret Spot! Doors open at 11:30 and the line often begins forming before that. Get there early and you can take advantage of our favorite “seats.” Head straight in along the bar, just past the last support column and before the stairs to the dance floor. There you’ll find the perfect spot to camp out and have a great view with natural boundaries.

And if the kiddos want to get on the dance floor, you’ve got a bird’s eye view of the whole place.

Have fun and God bless,
Jason

Lego Monthly Mini Build

The Lego Monthly Mini Build gives children, ages 6 to 14, a chance to visit a Lego Store, build a unique model, and take it home for free!

First, you must join the Lego VIP program. It’s also free and offers bonuses on purchases and access to events like these.

Then, you can go to this link and register for the next month’s build starting the 15th of each month.

The process has gotten very easy as you can choose your appointment time within a two-day window, avoiding mad rushes and long lines.

The builds have seasonal themes and often include special elements that are hard to find. 

Our first mini build in 2014. Modifications come quickly.

Not only have I found value in the new, free pieces, but this gives you an opportunity to take your children to a store full of wonderful things to buy…AND NOT BUY ANYTHING. Now, I can stop by the Lego Store with my sons and they don’t have an expectation that we’ll be making a purchase. I’ve found that this habit has been of benefit in many stores as I have set and followed through on expectations.

God bless and happy building,
Jason

Active Learning

From Vogel Arte Visual:

Active learning; putting to mind and practice the basics of #jiujitsu || #ICANdoIt! || Learning, despite having general characteristics, always happens in the background in the context of one’s abilities, interests, down to the very moment itself. What is doable? What is solvable? Once we add our unique learning abilities, our educational experiences (settings) can encourage us to grasp ideas, acquire knowledge to retain and master. Or more generally, we may find activities that promote our curiosity. What can emerge, as we mature, is the ability for us to develop new capabilities. “Active learning is fundamental to the full development of human potential and that active learning occurs most effectively in settings that provide developmentally appropriate learning opportunities. Therefore the overarching goal of our early childhood work is to establish a flexible, ‘open framework…’
https://www.instagram.com/p/BpaSu6Ugdfm/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1wsrmwn1tae7o

From me: Yes!

What’s so beautiful about BJJ is that the learner only sees progress where it really counts, in the long term. There aren’t grades and check marks to be gained on a daily basis from external sources. There is an accumulation of skill that is nearly impossible to see from day to day. A progress that is real and comes from within, there’s no need to please a teacher or a test, the learner will KNOW when he or she is performing at a higher level than previously attained.

Creepier than Halloween

Using political power to get your way is creepy enough, but the memes in this year’s my-mob-is-better-than-your-mob festival are specifically designed to separate us from ourselves and other individuals. They want you to surrender yourself to a group, to not be you.

Find yourself, get out of the group think.

Sessions 4 and 5 with FIRST Lego League Junior

These sessions focused on specific challenges that will be faced by living on the Moon.

Session 4: Water on the Moon

The team tackled questions of finding ice then melting, transporting, filtering, storing, and using the water. Lots of ideas came forward and the team members were able to build their prototypes.

Crush, melt, scan, and pipeline to personal water storage.
Vehicular transport of melted ice (I LOVE the colors).
Storage, transport, and filtration machines.
High-speed distillation during high-speed transport.

Then the team built and programmed two different machines using the Lego WeDo 2.0 system.

“Sweep”
Modified build to automatically unload cargo from shuttle.

Watching them work together, exchange ideas, take turns, and have fun while bringing their creations to life is the most rewarding part of any session for me.

Session 5: Energy on the Moon

How will we get energy for our Moon Base? How will we store it? Use it?

The team had to work hard on their ideas and came up with some great builds.

Guest Coach Sadie brought her own fuel.

The team then built and programmed “Grab.” With each session the builds become more challenging and the team has to advance their assembling and coding skills.

“Grab”
“Grab” modified into a crunching machine. In lieu of Moon ice, a minifigure is crushed.

This week we’ll be taking on more challenges involving life on the Moon and I look forward to sharing our solutions.

God bless,
Jason