The healing journey of a widowed, unschooling badass in Delaware.
Isaiah 2:5 KJV — O house of Jacob, come ye, and let us walk in the light of the LORD.
Although this chapter is a prophecy of the latter days, the call to action is present. Today we can walk in the light of the Lord.
No matter the future, today is for living.
Chapter 1 focuses on the spiritual death and dryness of Judah and Jerusalem.
God declares that this “dross” must be burned away and that the people will be returned to faithfulness.
To renew, we must clear completely the habits that separate us from God. This is a difficult process that demands the sacrifice of our worldly attachments.
Since I started carrying a permanent image of a dreaming Jacob, he’s been showing up more often.
Isaiah 41:13-14 KJV — For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee. Fear not, thou worm Jacob, and ye men of Israel; I will help thee, saith the LORD, and thy redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.
This Scripture appeared in my devotional reading and it struck me that I have read very little of the book of Isaiah. My Student Bible contains a plan to read it in 63 days. I’m looking forward to my first independent study of one of the books of the Old Testament.
Our gifted programs were called LEEP and PROBE. I forget what the acronyms meant, but being labeled “gifted” was an invaluable experience.
I was an energetic kid (this won’t be this story’s last shocking revelation). Luckily, even with ADD (ADHD wasn’t mainstreamed yet) diagnoses on the rise, I had parents who inherently resisted systemic pressures and honored my Tazmanian Devil-style of learning.
Wildly sober, I wasn’t considered for the gifted program in early elementary. Midway through 4th grade, a teacher finally insisted that I be tested. I was excited to get to miss classes once a month with the smart kids (we were bussed to a special learning center). They were less enthusiastic. They all got tested in 1st grade, logically concluding that it wasn’t anything special to pass the entrance exam after three more years of school. It was an IQ test, not age dependent, but no one cared to explain the nuances to us subjects.
For the next eight years, I existed in a liminal educational space. The smart kids never accepted me as one of their own, but everyone else saw me get on the gifted bus and go to honors and seminar classes.
For good and ill, I had inherited an inclination to not give a shit about other people’s opinions.
LEEP and PROBE offered deep dives into subjects that were hardly broached in school. Genetics, computer programming, environmental studies, photojournalism, and filmmaking were highlights of those years. I also had my first experience with a Muslim convert, observing my favorite teacher, Mr. Lowe, change his name and appearance to conform to his new beliefs. These buildings became a symbol of a world of possibility where I was free to explore. The day-to-day of the regular school building was a constant battle to resist grey standardization.
The meme above has little to do with my experience. The late bestowing of the label “gifted” forced me to embrace my independent nature. God set me against these social anxieties (he had a whole other set of difficulties picked out for me).
I was blessed to be largely free of the academic pressures. I’m doubly blessed to be able to offer a similar freedom to my sons in our home education environment.
Homemade meat seasonings and an afternoon of lounging on our “tri-mock? Yeah, it was a good day.
There are two physical genders, but energy exists on a spectrum. We all contain masculine and feminine energies. We’re born with a certain balance. This balance is altered over time as trauma and healing minimize and maximize our potential, respectively.
Males contain more masculine and females contain more feminine, generally. I’ll mansplain here that this does not deny the fact that some females have higher masculines than some males, and vice versa. This is a nuanced conversation, jump out now if you are uncomfortable with generalizations.
I’m a male with a high feminine energy (some would say a high masculine as well, both due to my healing journey). I am very comfortable with my feminine traits. I became a widower six years ago and had to cultivate that energy to thrive as a single parent.
I also recognize where I lack work to do better.
Leadership is a masculine trait. Compassion is a feminine trait. The best leaders access their compassionate energy to understand those they are leading. Effectively compassionate people use leadership to direct action most productively (conscientiousness). This is the practical application of the masculine/feminine balance.
Leadership in humans has little to do with physical strength. Yes, it is a factor in male hierarchies, but not dominant in leadership roles (e.g., professional sports coaches). If the world was run by the physically strongest men, then evolution would have favored this trait and humans would be getting bigger and stronger. Instead, we see our species growing in head size and shrinking in body mass. Look at the men around you. Look at CEOs and politicians.
I hope that by using the feminine/masculine energy paradigm, we can see that it is critical that we recognize those energy balances in ourselves and honor them in others.
I’m only halfway through this interview with former CDC Chief Dr. Robert Redfield, but there are so many bombs dropped, it’s hard to believe this isn’t a bigger story right now.
Watch for:
1. There was never any evidence for the wet market hypothesis, but there was early evidence for the lab leak hypothesis.
2. Fauci’s focus was protecting “Science.” Redfield uses the phrase “lack of transparency” as a euphemism for “lying.”
3. Fauci influenced the change in the definition of “gain of function research” to get around Obama’s ban on such research.
4. The definition of vaccine was changed to fit a narrative.
5. Redfield disagreed with vaccine mandates.
There’s more, but I wish this doctor had been more vocal during the Lockdowns. Normalizing the point of view many of us had in 2020 is small solace. Cuomo and Redfield exhibit a minimal level of bravery in discussing these ideas in 2024.
I heard this guy was a trouble maker, so I thought I’d give him a listen. I really like his perspective and it’s the first time I’ve really enjoyed new hip-hop in a long while.
Isaac started his Saturday with Junior Rifle Club then jiu-jitsu training at Elevated Studios.
Westen started his day as an assistant instructor at Elevated then spent six hours at summer camp aide training with Delaware Nature Society.
Kristen began a massive mural at By Her Hand Tattoos, I helped with that and trained jiu-jitsu, and we both carted the boys around to and from their activities.
By late afternoon, we were all toast.
