Tag: bjj

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Uncomfort vs. Discomfort

I’ve struggled with one criticism of those who are less enthusiastic about wearing masks, “What, you can’t handle being uncomfortable to save lives?”

Put aside the hyperbole, belittling, debatables, and lack of compassion in that statement, and all I hear is Biff Tannen calling Marty McFly, “Chicken.”

Chicken? Uncomfortable? Getting out of my comfort zone borders on an obsession. I started jiu-jitsu at 41 and I’ve got huge guys laying their weight on my chest a couple nights a week while the intructor has to remind me that I’m not going to die. I mean, I’m small for a soccer player, jiu‐jitsu? Talk about discomfort.

There’s a clear difference in the way I use the terms, “discomfort” and “uncomfortable.”

Discomfortable things are what make us stronger as we explore unknown parts of the world, inner and outer. They are the challenges that press out assumptions and squeeze out weakness. They literally, and figuratively, make our world larger through overcoming them.

Uncomfortable things are signals that something is wrong. They tell us we shouldn’t have had that peanut butter fudge shake or stayed up so late last night. Being uncomfortable is a sign of not honoring one’s mind, body, and soul.

Uncomfort is focusing on breathing behind a mask because you feel the anxiety creeping up. Discomfort is focusing on breathing while a sparing partner presses his weight down on you, trying to wear you down and scare you when you needn’t

Uncomfort is being in a relationship that doesn’t feel right, but you don’t know how to express it. Discomfort is the conversation you have with a romantic partner when something is wrong and you want to get to the bottom of it.

I lived too long being uncomfortable. Hangovers, irregular bowels, easy frustrations, anxiety, fatigue, and numerous other symptoms of not taking care of myself. I was programmed, as many are, to live with these uncomforts as the price of an exciting life. Heck, I see people accepting uncomfortable existences in exchange for mundane and transient peace.

Being okay with being uncomfortable has allowed Americans to become sicker and sicker. We don’t listen to our own bodies and have become disconnected. Our society was primed to be a victim of a virus with a very specific target.

Discomfort is where we go to do the most important learning. Uncomfort is telling us we’re going the wrong way.

God bless, I appreciate you, and thank you for reading,

Jason

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Patience and Voluntarism

I’m proud of my son for getting back on the mats at Elevated Studios this week. He’s been mentally wrestling with attending class. I’ve tried to have patience and remember that if I force him to do a thing, that he’ll eventually hate the thing, me, or himself. I’ve asked him questions and attempted to find a way to help him train again. I can’t say anything I did or said got him there. He’s always some mystery to me.

For all that I don’t know, I am confident that letting him make these decisions is the right path in allowing him to develop as an independent individual.

God bless and thank you for reading,

Jason

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Curate Your Community

We are surrounded by impressive people who bring brilliance, strength, fun, compassion, beauty, bravery, passion, challenge, faith, joy, and love into our world. We gravitate towards excellence and engage it whenever possible. It’s no accident. After 12 hours of adventure in Philadelphia with home-educating families, Brazilian jiu-jitsu bad-asses, an FBI agent, and a couple librarians, I remembered why we frequently pause our adventures to connect with so many people.

I didn’t know it would lead to a holistic learning lifestyle when I first watched my sons asking museum security about a painting. I didn’t know chatting with a martial arts school at a crowded event about their summer camps would blossom into the most consistent component of our learning environment. I didn’t know small talking with homeschooling and unschooling moms would build a support structure that has buoyed us in hard times and created opportunities we would have otherwise missed.

I’ve learned that opportunity is everywhere and it is almost always locked away in a human who can’t wait to reveal it to you. I’ve learned that human connection is the key. Not just to experiences and knowledge, but to deeper understanding of God and the world around us. “Oneness” doesn’t mean we’re all the same, it means there are threads that join each of us together, one at a time. When we are open enough to see these threads and wrap our hands around them, we find something new in ourselves.

Each individual you meaningfully relate with becomes part of your community. Get into the habit of just chatting with people and soon you will find that you have an amazing world opening up around you.

Have a God blessed day,
Jason

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Active Learning

From Vogel Arte Visual:

Active learning; putting to mind and practice the basics of #jiujitsu || #ICANdoIt! || Learning, despite having general characteristics, always happens in the background in the context of one’s abilities, interests, down to the very moment itself. What is doable? What is solvable? Once we add our unique learning abilities, our educational experiences (settings) can encourage us to grasp ideas, acquire knowledge to retain and master. Or more generally, we may find activities that promote our curiosity. What can emerge, as we mature, is the ability for us to develop new capabilities. “Active learning is fundamental to the full development of human potential and that active learning occurs most effectively in settings that provide developmentally appropriate learning opportunities. Therefore the overarching goal of our early childhood work is to establish a flexible, ‘open framework…’
https://www.instagram.com/p/BpaSu6Ugdfm/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1wsrmwn1tae7o

From me: Yes!

What’s so beautiful about BJJ is that the learner only sees progress where it really counts, in the long term. There aren’t grades and check marks to be gained on a daily basis from external sources. There is an accumulation of skill that is nearly impossible to see from day to day. A progress that is real and comes from within, there’s no need to please a teacher or a test, the learner will KNOW when he or she is performing at a higher level than previously attained.

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Z3 Adventures: The Near Disaster(s) at Raven Rock

That is the look of a boy who did not look before he leapt.

Tentatively, “Uh…Dad?” My heart was in the process of slowing as I had turned away from my mountain goat of a son jumping over crevices as if hundreds of feet of rocky death were not waiting below. Now that heart stopped. If he was being cautious I imagined he was now hanging from an outcropping, not sure how to recover. Fortunately, he was just trying to get back the way he came and his change in perspective showed him just how high we were.

I counted it as a free-range-parenting win (child alive, unscathed!, learning his limits) and helped him back across to our snacky lunch and our other impending disaster.

See the boot on my older’s right foot? Yeah, no lace. See the sole between the raisins and graham crackers? Yeah, not on the boot.

We weren’t halfway through a 2.5-mile hike when the sole began to separate from the boot. Turn back to possibly never see Coopers Rock State Forest‘s Raven Rock? Carry him when the boot inevitably failed? Or go pirate MacGyver and carry on?

Not the first attempt, one of my laces and a backpack drawstring.

They don’t come tougher or more determined than my sons. As each rig failed he stopped and followed my directions as I asked him to sit, stand, hold onto me, let go, etc., etc… 

Fourth or fifth configuration.

They both inspired me as they took the slow pace in stride and we discovered a lot along the way.


Red eft stage (terrestrial) of the Red-spotted Newt. Identification care of Delaware Nature Society’s Jim White.
A snake, self-identified (by me, not the snake).
Mountain magnolias often brightened our path.
Lots of sole support, looking like we have a winner.

We’re moving along, rain is coming down, and he tests each rig by dancing, walking backwards, and spinning at every opportunity.

And then…

Yep, the other sole gets loose and I trade another lace. I figure I’ll be carrying him pretty soon as our extended time on the trail put us closer to a forecasted storm. Nope, we all trudged on and finished an estimated 90-minute hike in just under four hours. It was remarkable and we all knew it. The patience and determination they showed on that trail gave them a confidence that no pep talk could.

“Dad, did we leave North America?”

It was a hearty lunch of baked beans, mac and cheese, and hot dogs for all of us. But the day was not done, there were hours of sunlight left and a world to explore. What to do next?

That’s right, an hour of Brazilian jiu-jitsu at Team Junqueira Cheat Lake, West Virginia, with some great competitors to wind down.

Super Fight

It’s insane. There’s no other word. We hit a museum, arboretum, and new campground the next day. I look forward to telling all the stories.

God bless,
Jason

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Tap Cancer Out 2018 Philly BJJ Open

Guiding a learning lifestyle with young children is chasing a moving target. Interests can grow or wane daily or by the hour. I’ve learned to listen and observe with intention, to know my sons as well as I can and feed their fickle hungers. However, there is one discipline that has consistently grabbed their attention week after week for more than three years.

Brazilian jiu-jitsu (BJJ) has become foundational to our home education lifestyle. They attend classes up to six times a week and we have all acquired important knowledge from Elevated Studios co-owner, Stephen Plyler. After watching and attending several BJJ tournaments, my sons are competing in their first at the Tap Cancer Out 2018 Philly BJJ Open.

As many families, we have suffered painful damage from the diverse effects of cancer. This organization targets childhood cancer research in an effort to protect our most vulnerable sons and daughters. My boys are raising funds and training hard.

I don’t think they could be better prepared for this competition. After visiting half a dozen other schools, I am confident that Elevated is the highest quality training I could find for my sons. Stephen is honest, encouraging, fun, focused, determined, and competitive. He’s been a role model of the utmost caliber for all of his students. We’re all really excited and proud to represent his school in this tournament.

God bless,
Jason

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#BJJLife

Three-and-a-half years ago my sons won a month of classes at Elevated Studios Brazillian Jiu-Jitsu. With six youth classes available per week, we were able to sink our teeth into the discipline and see if it was the right fit. But after watching co-owner and lead coach Stephen Plyler instruct for 45 minutes, I was all but convinced that we would be staying.

An introduction to Brazillian jiu-jitsu.
White belts earned.

With varying paths, my sons have thrived at Elevated. They’ve watched Stephen train at the fantastic Balance Studios and achieve the top submission of the evening at Philly’s Fight to Win 81. They’ve grown in strength, maturity, and community. When they lost their mother to a sudden illness, Elevated stepped up to support our family in spiritual, emotional, practical, and financial ways. The Roll for Zerbeys was a truly fun and uplifting experience for us and all who participated.

#BJJFamily
No Mercy
Just a little deeper…

Now these boys are taking an opportunity to tests their skills and do some good. Both are competing and fundraising for Tap Cancer Out’s Grappling for Good Tour at United Sports in Downingtown, PA, on October 27th. Click on that link to donate and be assured that pictures and stories will be forth coming. Please also consider attending and supporting their efforts on the mat.

God bless,
Jason

Header photo credit: Mark Likosky

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An Elevated Family

Three years ago this month our boys began training Brazilian jiu-jitsu at Elevated Studios.

Stephen and Renée Plyler have become so much to our family. They are mentors to our boys and treat them as equals. Stephen is an expert instructor and Renée always wants to know what’s happening on the home education front.

When Mary was sick, Stephen came and visited her and Renée is often watching the boys for me. They were at Mary’s memorial service and I can always count on them when I need help.

Incredibly, Elevated is even bigger than these two impressive individuals.  When the Roll for Zerbeys fundraiser was held, the studio was packed with students of all ages, parents, friends, and family. The children grappled with each other and black belts.

It’s not just skill that’s lifted up at Elevated. Every day they are empowering others to be stronger in mind, body, and spirit. I’ve learned a lot by observing Stephen’s teaching techniques and discussing the ins-and-outs of home education with Renée. My boys are more significant humans thanks to their guidance.

God bless,

Jason